Archive for March, 2010

Guilt & Rambling

Posted in Uncategorized on March 18, 2010 by mrwil

As a premise, lets begin with the actual point of this entry = I’m a LOUSY (lazy?) Blogger. Ya – that’s right…I’ve somehow {Note how I shirk responsibility} acquired a Twitter state of mind that demands – “I want the gist & ONLY the gist & I WANT IT NOW !!! Kinda like a USA Today (**That’s a POPular American newspaper…like a “Reader’s Digest” form of News, etc. for you Ozzies & “Outlanders”**.)

Ahhh…..but I digress. – Which is actually a fancy way of saying I’m getting off track and want to get back to the point I began with? – ANYWAY…speaking of Ozzies & Outlanders…One Ozzie in particular has been writing some extremely entertaining Blog entries over the last several months, tickling my titillation ( OH just go look it up – I don’t have the time.) which has quietly challenged me to put something new in here. I mean I have a damn Blog & am apparently allowing it to go to seed – so to speak. THERE, my guilt is officially sated,….now off we go, and to quote Bette Davis, “Put on your seatbelts…its going to be a bumpy ride”.

Now here’s the tough part. My friend’s Blog reflects recurrent themes of Boobs, Wine, Kids (her own), self realization/compartmentalization & humo(u)rous abandon. She’s so damn OPEN, I could drive a Mack truck through – no problem. (HEY! That’s a serious, heartfelt compliment – getcho mind outa da gutter!) She is also Libran, while I am Sun-Sign Virgo….you know, nit-picky, close to the vest, stogy…all that crap. Plus, I am male…Love Boobs – but mostly just have nice memories – SIGH….OK, we totally agree on the Wine & that means LOTS of it, whenever possible. Gawd’s greatest creation was the Grape. OK? – Just Sayin…….Kids – never had any ( & despise the little monsters on my block always putting a BIG dent in my wine-fueled, open 3rd floor window-rose colored glasses outlook on the world, anytime day/night, basically single fella, peace oriented autonomy OR, grocery store nirvana ( Where I also buy my wine ). SEE how complicated this gets?!…….Moving on to the other lack of parallel – You’re not getting that self depreciating-with-a-smile shit outa ME…especially in an open public forum! I save that kinda stuff for when I’m totally drunk at the bar w/ CLOSE friends ( or Skype – depending ). Use your imagination… what the hell – hep yo’sef !

So, NOW WHAT? ( or maybe I’m just subliminally wanting to have the Guinness Book of World Records Title for longest Blog opening-without really saying anything. OK…I’m actually good with that…so sue me.) **I’m also realizing that a full 1/3 of my vague rant thus far has been spent in soliloquy, so, who the hell do (*I) think I’m actually talking TO?….I warned you it gets complicated. Turn away or you may turn to salt. – again, Just Sayin – pick your poison.

If you haven’t left yet…you’re 1 of 2 kinds of people, EITHER> 1.) You don’t JUST “rubberneck” when coming across a bad car accident, you pull over & pretend you work for the local News – WITH a camera & make up some kinda media savvy nam-de-plume for yourself, to get real close in…..OR, 2.) You’re just my kind of twisted sumobitch &…with that special realization (Again the tie-in for you super note taking folks) I think I’d enjoy saying, “Let’s go to the bar – NOW! Don’t pass go & here’s your get out of jail FREE card. …SURE you can buy the first round – No Problemo! (& NO Kids allowed.) Maybe even sing some Karaoke after I can’t make out a damn thing other than the swirling lights. Come to think of it, I LOVE swirling lights…been “there” so often it brings me comfort. Speaking of “Comfort”…sure, I’ll have another shot before I go on. Janis Joplin is smiling down on me…I can feel it.

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Will somebody please call me a cab?